I went to the temple on Saturday night and really felt like writing on something that my roommates will probably laugh at me for, and some people might roll their eyes at me for, but ah well. This blog is my diary, so deal.
Marriage is going to be phenomenal. Well, at least, its an option to have a phenomenal marriage. Not every marriage is phenomenal, though. This is what I want in my future marriage:
I want to kneel across the altar and promise to devote my life to strengthen, love, cherish, and serve my husband, and have him do the same. I want to treat him like a King every day, because he will be my King. And in return I want a man who will treat me like the Divine Daughter I am, like a Queen. I want to serve him. I want to love him with my whole soul. I want to wholly love him with no glances backwards. Dive right in baby! I want to trust him more than 100%, with no trace of doubt or worry. Yes, things will be hard. Yes, there will be trials. Yes, there will be misunderstandings and stresses and concerns and issues. But to have a partner, companion, and love by my side to work through challenges. Sometimes I will have to bite my tongue. Sometimes I might have to pray for charity and to forgive. I will also have to pray to be forgiven for my own mistakes because, although children of divinity, we will both still be human. But with the Lord and with faith, every day can be full of blessings, love, kindness, and grace.
And then, to this measure of heaven, add the gift of children—the heritage of the Lord. Let me give my whole heart to a man and then have a family with him. Nothing in the world could be sweeter, more divine, or more awe-some than that. I cannot tell you how greatly my heart desires this. Yes, children are messy, loud, and pregnancy is painful to say it simply. But their smiles are the sweetest thing in the world, and when they hug you with chubby little arms the world turns right side up. And my point is, it is more than worth it. Let them stain the pillows, pee on the couch, eat all the cookies, and break my vases. Let me hug them, kiss them, bake them cookies, teach them to paint, swing on swings, and love them all my life long.
Who knows what life will hold for me. But I’ll tell you right now, these things are what I want more than anything else. And if I ever get them, I will be the happiest woman in the world. Until them, I remain happy and looking forward to a bright future.