Monday, October 15, 2012

Golly sweet pickle. I have a problem.

If there is one thing in the world I am worst at it is this:

Goodbye. Moving on. Farewell. Arrivederci. See ya later. Leaving people behind me.

Examples: (And no, these are not exaggerated)

**It took me 5 years (approximately 1,825 days!!!) to get over a boy who I never actually dated......or hung out with.......or ever even had a conversation with......but I really really liked anyway. And it took me 5 years to get over him. Pathetic. (I blame this insanity on the fact that I was a teenager with crazy hormones doing all sorts of terrible things to my mind.)

**The night before two of my roommates moved out was very hard for me. Even though they weren't going very far and we'd still be going to the same college, and they'd be just a few minutes drive away, or a phone call away. Yet I bawled like a baby.

**I started a uncontrollable public cry because my young women's leader was released. (This story is quite funny actually.) All the girls in YW memorized The Living Christ and sang it in front of all of our families. That same day my YW leader had been released. As we were singing, I looked at her, and started crying which gradually escalated to mild hysteria. It was a combination of the spirit and the thought of losing her (mind you, she was staying in the ward, and I would still see her every Sunday.) Unfortunately, my crying started a domino effect until all the girls were crying and no-one was singing. We stopped, collected ourselves, and finished our song.

**I cry every time I watch the last episode of a t.v. show and all the characters say goodbye. I know they're not real, but still, its just so sad.

**I get really emotional/depressed when I finish a good book. Its just so hard to say goodbye to the wonderful characters! I love them!!!

**I keep on crying every time I think of my friends and family and how much I love them. Which means I've cried  A LOT this last couple months.

So, you see, I have a problem. And now my problem has been multiplied by humongous proportions.

WHY THE LOVE?!!! OH THE HUMANITY!!!!!

I do believe that saying goodbye to all my family and friends (even if its "only" for 18 months) is the hardest thing I've ever done. Gosh it stinks!!!

And the even worse part is knowing that once I get to Bulgaria I am going to FALL IN LOVE and eventually be forced to say goodbye to all of that beloved goodness also.

Golly sweet pickle. I have a problem.

This is the closest thing I had to a picture of me crying. I had a hard time saying goodbye to that poor pasta after I dropped it in the sink. Sad day. :(

I try to remember that the fact that I get really upset and emotional about goodbye's is a GOOD thing because it means that I TRULY, DEEPLY, love. Really. Truly. Deeply. And this must be a good thing, right? Love is a good thing, I think?

So if I get teary eyed around you, just know its cause I love you. Or maybe not you, it could be the person next to you. (Just kidding. I most likely do love you). And if some tears fall, just see it as evidence of my everlasting admiration for you. And don't judge. Just slap me (helps me move on), and give me a hug. 

(P.S. In composing this, I realized that I must sound like a bawl-baby. Let it be known that while my emotions often sprinkle out my eyes, I generally do not frequently cry. Which is possibly because I usually don't have many goodbye's to say. I'm not a cry-baby. I'm just a.............occasionally-teary-but-when-it-rains-it-pours kind of girl. Generally, though, I am QUITE emotionally stable and more chipper than the average human bean.) ***I'll give you a sticker if you know what book "human bean" is from!!!

2 comments:

  1. Pick me!! The Borrowers!!
    P.S. I don't think you are a cry baby. You are awesome.

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    Replies
    1. Actually, I was thinking of the BFG... but I'll trust you and give you a sticker anyway. Because I love you. :)

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